Matt Lucas standing for the Tories in Moulsecoomb and Bevendean – Exclusive

Do you remember the TV quiz programme Shooting Stars with Vic Reeves and Bob Mortimer? And the Matt Lucas character dressed in a huge baby romper suit playing the drums and keeping the scores: “What’s the scores on the doors, George Dawes?” was the cry at the end of each round.

Well, standing in Moulsecoomb and Bevendean is George Dore. Sorry not THE George Dawes but Georgina Dore who likes to be known as George. You must watch the election campaign clips on YouTube of her and Maria Caulfield. Never in the field of human politics have two candidates felt so uncomfortable for so long in front of so few cameras. But fair play to them. They have produced four videos explaining why they want to be councillors and what improvements they hope to bring to the area.

Matt Lucas is a school teacher, having been brought up in rural Oxfordshire, she stresses her humble origins before rather ruining it by saying she went to Oxford University. it was a “hard process” she says. Matt says she is committed to education since it “opens doors”. After all she is a teacher working in the City. Hang on a moment? If she is a teacher working in the city she can’t stand for the Council unless she ….. doesn’t work in a state school. A Google search reveals she works at that school favoured and much chosen for their children by parents in Moulsecoomb and Bevendean ….. Brighton College.

Her write up on the Brighton College website reads: “Miss Georgina Dore MA (Oxon) joined Brighton College in September 2009. She previously taught for three years at Uppingham School. She is a boarding house tutor and also teaches Politics. Her special interests include British Decolonisation. She shares in the teaching of the Oxbridge programme as well.”

(While on the Brighton College website, have a look at the biography of the wild-eyed Mr Christopher Canning MA (Oxon) “Joined Brighton College in September 2010. His specialist interests include Anti-Semitism. He also teaches Politics.” I swear, it says his interests includes anti-semitism. I’m sure he doesn’t mean how it reads. It reminds me of the US politician who reassured his constituents that he was “anti-racist, anti-fascist, and anti-Semitic”. And that reminds me of the woman, again in the USA who said “I’m not a Republican or Democrat. I’m …. what do you call it? ….. I’m bi-sexual.”)

Back to Maria Caulfield and Matt Lucas, they are the Tory candidates in Moulsecoomb and Bevendean. I’ve mentioned that already, haven’t I? But hang on, there are three seats in M&B. Are the Tories fielding just two candidates? Of course not. Ayas Fallon-Khan is the candidate that Maria and Matt dare not speak his name. Why does he not appear in any of the videos?

I actually I have a lot of time and respect for both Maria and Ayas. Both are hard-working councillors. Neither are traditional Tories. As for George Lucas … didn’t he produce Star Wars? I’m really confused now ….